Fuck You

It goes without saying that Americans, by and large, are an extremely greedy, selfish and fortunate to the point of being spoiled, people. And though the lion's share of the American largesse is concentrated in the notorious "top 1%", the remaining majority of Americans are still living pretty high on the hog. But don't try to tell them that. Middle class Americans might as well be caste Hindu untouchables for the amount of bitching and woe-is-me-ing being done any time gas prices go up a few cents, or their taxes get raised a quarter of a percentage point. Despite the fact that the level of consumption presently practiced by Americans - even those considered 'poor' by whatever arbitrary standard is in use at the time - is far and beyond any sort of realistically sustainable level, whenever a crack starts to show in the facade of neverending supply meticulously constructed to meet our neverending demand, American's react with an uproar that would be hilarious if it wasn't so sad. While billions of people elsewhere in the world are watching the price of grain and wondering if they will be able to afford bread next week, Americans are bemoaning the fact that cigarettes cost a quarter more a pack than they did last year. While many around the world worry about the cost of heating oil, hoping that they can continue to stave off the winter cold for a few more months, Americans are worried about the cost of jet fuel, up in arms over the fact that a cross-country flight costs $20 more this year than it did last year, what with the impending recession and all. And they don't even serve you an in-flight meal anymore.

You can read in the newspaper every day, the tragic tales of the economic dire straits faced by everyday Americans in the wake of the recent subprime mortgage debacle. Foreclosures are running at historic highs. People are being thrown out into the streets. However most of these people are folks who bought homes well-out of their realistic price range by way of ill-advised multiple or adjustable-rate mortgages. Instead of settling for less they did things the American way: spending until you don't have any more, borrowing, spending some more, then borrowing some more, rinsing and repeating until your finances are in a nice foamy lather. Sorry about their luck. Of course this process serves as a nice little microcosm of American consumerism as a whole, in that it only works for so long. Traditionally this period was only as long as it took for your creditors to figure out you were a no good motherfucker and call in your debts. But lately, its been extended. Creditors just pass the borrowing up the ladder, selling debt like a real, tangible product. Debt somehow became a commodity, and not just any commodity, but one that you could make a mint on. Selling debt is like selling a thought, only more speculative. Yet there were plenty of huge financial companies, some of the bedrocks of American financial markets, who battled for the right to buy it. And thus irresponsibility once contained to individual greedy Americans got slowly transferred to greedy American companies, who had, of course, always been greedy, but never in such a blindly irresponsible way. These banks and financial institutions became like bears, too lazy to forage, instead seeking out dumpsters and trash cans for an easy meal. But bears who do this too many times, of course, get shot. And thus is the story of....(DRUMROLL) Bear Stearns, formerly one of America, nay the world's, largest investment banks, who like many of its peers got caught up in the subprime feeding frenzy and ended up paying the same price as the individual "victims" of the mortgage crisis, namely: everything. On the verge of bankruptcy last week, Bear Stearns was bailed out by the federal government, who backed a sale of the company to rival JP Morgan, only after the company's value had contracted from some $10 billion to $236 million over the span of one weekend.

Like the individual tales of woe, the stories printed by the mainstream media in the wake of the Bear Stearns debacle were stunningly indicative of the deeply entrenched sense of entitlement that forms the basis of modern day America. One such story, in the San Francisco Chronicle attempted to show the utter devastation wreaked upon Bear Stearn employees by this sudden failure. "James Cayne, the firm’s chairman and former chief executive, holding on to his Bear stock was a point of pride, and he rarely, if ever, sold," said the story A billionaire just over a year ago when Bear’s stock soared past $160, his 5.8 million shares are now worth about $28 million." Only $28 million dollars?? How is he supposed to LIVE!!!! HOW WILL HIS KIDS EAT!?????? The lesser employees of the company found themselves in even more dire straights. "'My life has been flushed down the drain,' said one person. There was talk Monday that with their life savings nearly depleted, some executives had moved quickly, putting their weekend homes on the market." Oh man. Selling the weekend home? Might as well get out the revolver and just end it all. America: when things get bad, sell your weekend home.